you refuse to read
it’s knowing but not believing
it’s I’m in love with you
and I would laugh
at the ridiculousness
if I wasn’t so sad
why do we do this to each other
this push and pull
someone could lay down at my feet
and I would still
look at you
for affection that you will never give
why are we hard wired
to love
the ones
who don’t want us
a very great joke
if it wasn’t so painful
to watch
I can feel myself
become less
and I hate it
it stings and it burns
and it makes me want to
bite something
how do some girls
collect men in their pockets
each name pleading
hanging on her breath
I can’t seem to make
anyone fall in love with me
my kindness
doesn’t attract
my target
it repulses him
but I am unable to stop
I’m the one in the movie
who loses
who doesn’t take anyone home
I used to
take anyone home
but now
I only want you
and no other
I have set myself up for disaster
I cannot leave this path
I have created
out of desperation
and longing
I cannot forget
the feeling
in my stomach
when I know
you are near
I cannot stop
I can’t control the way
my mind concentrates
on every word you say
this love has torn me down
ripped me open
you feed on my insides
without blinking
without apologies
thespaceinmybed 